If Blue States Formed Their Own Country …

I received this e-mail that had a message to Red States:

“Dear Red States, We’ve decided we’re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we’re taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren’t aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the Northeastern states. After this election, we’ll be adding Colorado and New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, especially to the people of our new country – Nuevo California.

“To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and
Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole’ Miss. We get 85 percent of America’s venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get
two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share. …

“With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country’s fresh water, 90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation’s fresh fruit, 97 percent of America’s quality wines (you can serve French
wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister
schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you very much.

“In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99
percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, as Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, and Clemson.”

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4 Responses to If Blue States Formed Their Own Country …

  1. Gordon says:

    Dear Blue states

    You’ll also get 10% unemployment.

    Larry Flynt

    More people killed in your cities every evening than killed in Iraq in a year.

    You also get your horrible inner city public schools.

    All the homeless and bums.

    Every thing you think you may offer to the rest of us normal people, we’ll buy cheaper from Mexico and Chile and Nicaragua, etc etc.

    See you later…


    Red States

  2. jeremy says:

    This has been around since at least 2005. It’s brilliant!

  3. jeremy says:

    Best of all: none of you slack-jawed, sourceless and fact-deprived idiots.


    Blue States

  4. Rick says:


    The author of that is insufferably arrogant. That is exactly the attitude that conservatives fear, a belief that they are the elite and that the “masses” are incapable of making decisions for themselves. Having said that, I believe that we would be best served if we sundered that nation peacefully. Civil wars are the worst kind and it is clear to me the nation is broken.

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